My 3 1/2 year old boy is getting really confused, and I'm to blame. For most of his life, I've told him how eating healthy foods, especially vegetables, meats and fruits will help him to "grow big, strong and healthy". On occasion, he'll see me eat an Atkins bar, and ask about it. I've told him it's "diet food" to which he says, "Oh, I like diet food. Does it make me grow big and strong?" Yes, he's had a bite here and there. I respond by saying, "no, it helps Mummy to grow smaller" We've also talked about how special treat foods (cookie, ice cream, white potatoes, etc) don't make him grow big and strong, but big and weak.
Over the past week he's been asking me if I'm growing smaller. I say, "yes, I'm trying to." Yesterday he got the idea that I was going to grow smaller, all the way to being "a teeny, tiny baby." And that scared him. His bottom lip puffed out, and tears were threatening as he whimpered, "I don't want Mummy to be a teeny, tiny baby back in Grandma's tummy" I tried explaining to him that that was not going to happen, that I wouldn't get shorter, or taller for that matter. I was just trying to make my hips and tummy smaller. Then, my hubby had the idea to tell him I had owies on my feet, and I needed to grow smaller to make my feet not hurt. I'm not sure that helped.
Anyhow, I'm at a bit of a loss how to explain it to him so that he is not afraid, and can understand why I can't eat everything he does. I'm really glad he's a boy, I've always been concerned about passing my bad food habits/relationship on, and feel like he has some leeway being male. If anyone has any suggestions, I'd really appreciate it!
I don´t know how old he is, but I think you should just tell him the truth. Try to explain your situation to him in simple words and I´m sure he will understand.
ReplyDeleteYou are a great writer in your blog, so I´m sure you can explain it to him too! :)
One of my kiddos is the same age. It is amazing what goes though their little minds. Great weigh-in
ReplyDeleteI don't really talk about trying to lose weight but I talk more about being stronger and more fit. I would say something about "This is something for Mommy to help make me strong and fit but it's not something you need."
ReplyDeleteLast night my 3-year old and 6-year old were "working out" while I made dinner. They spent about 1 minute carrying around a medicine ball and that qualified as working out. They usually only join me in stretches when I work out, and I tell them they don't have to lift weights yet. If they want to, I give them an empty water bottle to pretend.
I agree with Lainie's approach. Use words like, strong and healthy and fit, rather than smaller and weight loss. The bars are for "grown-ups", as lots of things are.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't mention weight loss, since it is so confusing. He may never notice the change: you will always be Mommy and look like Mommy to him, regardless of how much you weigh.
Good luck!
could it be as simple as the strongerfitter FOOD AS FUEL analogy?
ReplyDeletered light foods yellow light foods and green light foods?
Im already using the fuel one with my almost3 year old.
email me if you wanna brainstorm.
Awww that is so cute.
ReplyDeleteOh that's a tough one!
ReplyDeleteMy daughter is the same age. I have never talked to her about my size or diet or anything like that. If she asks for something, like maybe a sugar-free yogurt (which I don't let her have artificial sweeteners) I just say, no, that's mommy's. Same as when she asks for coffee... "no, coffee is for grown ups, not for children."
Maybe the getting smaller concept is too much for him. You could just start telling him you are getting healthy so you can run fast and play with him.
Let us know how it goes.
My girls keep asking why I'm measuring everything I eat. I just tell them that I want to know exactly how much I'm eating so that I can get healthier. Not sure it's the best approach, but it's what I do. I definitely don't want to pass on my food issues to them!
ReplyDelete